All stories:
Eve, pregnant at 21 weeks at the time of her testimony, shares her experience:
It's a very desired baby. We wanted to welcome our 7th child. We decided to have her on New Year's Day. Being hyperfertile, it only took one time for my little princess to come along.
From the 6th week, the nausea started at work. I couldn't stand the smells of the houses where I worked. At 7 weeks, the vomiting began! Impossible to drink or eat without vomiting. A nightmare! Just thinking about food or drink made me vomit immediately.
The emergency room visit was bearable. The caregivers were very kind and gentle. The worst remark came from my gynecologist, who has been following me for 16 years... "If sweets pass, then everything passes! It's all in your head..." For me, it was a hard thing to hear, not just because of the physical discomfort and pain.
I felt immense guilt for not being able to take care of my children anymore. It affected me a lot. I couldn't cook or clean. As a housekeeper myself, I had to ask for help from a colleague. I felt like a bad mother. Things are a bit better now, but it's still not the life they were used to having with me, and it breaks my heart.
I also admit I felt ashamed, but I thought about abortion... to all those who think about it, don't blame yourselves! I think we suffer so much that it's legitimate to consider it, even if it's not in line with our beliefs. I told the father one night while crying, unable to breathe properly between two powerful and painful vomiting episodes.
He told me to do it if that's what I wanted, but that I would regret it all my life. He was right, I couldn't bring myself to do it.
[Message for volunteers:] I want to thank the association. Without them, I would probably have given up already because I couldn't bear what I was going through, and I would have fallen into depression, I'm almost certain!
I also want to say that the partner's support is essential. Even today, he prepares meals, helps with the cleaning when our housekeeper isn't around. There's no shame in asking for help; I lost a lot of autonomy.
Try to be surrounded as much as possible.
Aurélie Piraprez TW ABORTION
I wanted to give life and I almost lost mine. That's how I would describe this pregnancy...
I was completely dehydrated. I hadn't ingested any liquids or solids. I lost 5 kg in one week!!
I couldn't continue like that, and the various treatments weren't working. I was forced to make a decision...
I had to undergo a medical abortion.
But when it came time for my body to expel the fetus, it was a nightmare.
I lost consciousness multiple times; my husband was in a panic.
We had to call for an ambulance, and they took me to the nearest hospital, which wasn't the one where I usually receive care.
It's a Flemish hospital, and in their eyes, there was incomprehension.
"You're aborting due to Hyperemesis Gravidarum?"
For them, it wasn't possible. We were surprised that they even knew about the condition, by its name at least...
I was then explained that there were different treatments and that abortion wasn't the solution...
The gynecologist was upset, saddened to see that the condition isn't recognized much elsewhere!
Finally, after my rehydration, I started feeling better. The symptoms disappeared immediately...
What a relief to become "normal" again...
But one question will always linger in my mind: "Were you a little girl or a little boy?"
I will never know because of you, cursed Hyperemesis!!
I lost what was becoming the most precious thing to me, what was starting to take up space in my heart.
But amidst all this misfortune, I am lucky, lucky to have had my first little boy, my MIRACLE!
Because yes, he truly is one! Healthy, intelligent, kind, beautiful!!
Ysa Vandeponseele
I found out about the pregnancy on April 24, 2021; it was my biggest dream, and I was truly happy. My surroundings were also thrilled with this news.
The first symptoms appeared even before the pregnancy test. I was vomiting, feeling nauseous, lost a lot of weight, and even vomited blood. It was my general practitioner who diagnosed me; the first gynecologist... it was a catastrophe.
My loved ones were very sad to see me in this state. They were all worried about my health and that of my baby.
My worst memory was vomiting blood; my esophagus was so irritated because of the vomiting...
I didn't escape the hurtful comments from some caregivers: 'You got pregnant unexpectedly; it's good for you to lose weight,' 'Pregnancy is not an illness.'
I wanted 3 children, but because of what happened to me, I told my partner that we will probably have only one.
My advice? Surround yourself with family as much as possible, don't hesitate to talk about it around you or even to a therapist. Don't hesitate to talk about it; some professionals are unaware of the condition, and you can also raise awareness among them.
Manon Faidherbe
I was very happy, and so was my whole family when we found out about the pregnancy. But 3 to 4 weeks after the test, HG appeared.
I vomited, felt nauseous, lost weight, and completely lost my appetite...
Unfortunately, I was not supported at all by the medical staff. I never received a diagnosis!
My family was at a loss facing the situation.
To all the HG-mamas out there: You are not alone in this; you need to talk about it with those around you.
Anaëlle Voisin
On September 30, 2018, I found out about my pregnancy, and I felt immense joy. The symptoms appeared 8 weeks after the pregnancy test. I had no idea about hyperemesis gravidarum; I was extremely sick! Constant nausea, frequent vomiting after every meal, regardless of what I ate. I was so thirsty. Nobody around me knew about the condition. Before being diagnosed, I hesitated to talk about it because I kept hearing that being sick during pregnancy was something normal. Numerous days felt endless. The days leading up to hospitalization were the worst. I had an appointment with my gynecologist, and I hadn't eaten anything since the morning before. During the three-day hospital stay, there was no solid food, just the IV. I was fortunate to have a gynecologist who was very attentive, particularly regarding my health (my general practitioner had recommended him because of my health issues). My blood levels were very high, and he mentioned it could be twins or something else.
It turned out to be a single baby, and two weeks later, he noticed that I had lost a little over 5kg. He asked me how I was feeling, and I could tell him that I was having a lot of difficulty, unable to eat or drink without vomiting. After examining me, as I was getting dressed, I overheard him making a phone call and booking a room urgently. When I came out, he explained that I had HG and that I needed to go back home to pack for a weekend because I had to go to the emergency room to be hospitalized and receive intravenous glucose to rehydrate.
Charline Valenduc
Before the pregnancy test, the symptoms appeared. Nausea, vomiting, even when there was nothing left to throw up, I felt queasy, low blood pressure, reflux.
My gynecologist didn't diagnose anything, and at the emergency room, they didn't have time... For them, it was 'normal.'
My surroundings didn't grasp the extent of what I was going through daily, but they were at a loss.
I was confined for 9 months with a pit in my stomach, fearing being sick somewhere. Once, I fainted from weakness at Carrefour.
Our bodies put us through hell for 9 months, but it shows you the courage, perseverance, and strength hidden within us.
To Hg-mamas: You are not alone, take time for yourself. You will hurt, you will cry, scream in pain, but once you have your baby in your arms, what you endured was not in vain.
Adélaïde Lanson
Before the pregnancy test, the symptoms appeared. Nausea, vomiting persisted, even when I had nothing left to vomit, I still felt queasy, low blood pressure, reflux.
My gynecologist did not make a diagnosis and at the emergency room, they didn't have time... For them, it was 'normal'.
My entourage didn't understand the extent of what I was experiencing on a daily basis, but they were distraught.
I was locked in for 9 months with a pit in my stomach, fearing being sick somewhere. Once, I fainted from weakness at Carrefour.
Our bodies put us through hell for 9 months, but it shows you the courage, perseverance, and strength that lies deep within us.
To Hg-mamas: You are not alone, take time for yourself. You will hurt, you will cry, scream in pain, but once you hold your baby, what you endured wasn't for nothing."
"Hello, I'm contacting you to share my testimony. Indeed, I was very happy to get pregnant last year around March. And I naively thought I could continue working almost until childbirth. But impossible. Barely a month and a half into pregnancy, my body refused to keep any food down. Even a cracker would come out just as quickly. At home, however, it was my entourage that refused to understand. While my partner supported me and did what he could, my father had decided that he would come to do construction work at my place no matter the hour or my condition. I couldn't stay in bed because of the drills and other noisy tools. Additionally, he demanded that I be with him to see the progress of the work while I felt like I was at death's door (the works that took 8 months instead of the initially announced 3). On May 1st, the verdict came, my doctor told me that she couldn't do anything for me. Go to the emergency room, that's all there is to do. Indeed, I had lost more than 10% of my weight, I was given a drip in the middle of the night, and I had to go 48 hours without eating to empty my stomach properly. My partner was taking great care of me. I was hospitalized in maternity and the midwives were very attentive.
Thank you for creating this group. It feels good to talk about it, to feel less alone, heard, and understood. 🙂
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Charline Valenduc
Before the pregnancy test, the symptoms appeared. Nausea, vomiting, even when there was nothing left to throw up, I felt queasy, low blood pressure, reflux.
My gynecologist didn't diagnose anything, and at the emergency room, they didn't have time... For them, it was 'normal.'
My surroundings didn't grasp the extent of what I was going through daily, but they were at a loss.
I was confined for 9 months with a pit in my stomach, fearing being sick somewhere. Once, I fainted from weakness at Carrefour.
Our bodies put us through hell for 9 months, but it shows you the courage, perseverance, and strength hidden within us.
To Hg-mamas: You are not alone, take time for yourself. You will hurt, you will cry, scream in pain, but once you have your baby in your arms, what you endured was not in vain.
Clémentine Jacob
My partner and I wanted to have a child. I had consulted my gynecologist beforehand to ensure that everything was fine and that my body was ready to conceive. All lights were green. The pregnancy came very quickly. The gynecologist had told us that it could take up to a year to get pregnant, so we were very surprised that it happened so fast! Barely 2 or 3 months after stopping the pill.
I was over the moon. I felt like I was floating. My partner told me that I was radiant and had a new glow in my eyes... It was a dream coming true. And then, very quickly after the pregnancy test, the first vomiting and nausea started. At first, I wasn't worried. I felt like the stereotypical pregnant woman with my vomiting and nausea... Like in a movie! But very quickly, it got worse. I was greatly bothered by smells, by temperature changes. I couldn't stand
much. Everything made me queasy and caused incredible nausea.
I couldn't tolerate water, tea, or sodas anymore. Everything came back up. Only cold sparkling water with lemon went down...
As someone who loved vegetables and fruits, their mere smell or texture made me vomit...
I was vomiting 4 to 5 times a day. It became my daily routine. I became afraid to eat because I knew I would vomit afterwards...
At first, my partner was there, waiting for me outside the bathroom to give me a hug
and reassure me. Afterward, I was vomiting so much that he was at a loss, he didn't know how to react.
I would come out of the bathroom crying, exhausted emotionally and psychologically. I had to stop working twice for a whole month because the vomiting was frequent and draining. I was no longer myself. I had no strength, no energy, no
taste for anything. I, who usually enjoy sports and walks, stayed confined at home, slumped in the chair because I didn't have the strength for anything. On the worst days, my goal for the day was to take a shower and get dressed. After that, I had to lie down again because it had taken too much energy. I couldn't read, draw, or paint, my favorite hobbies. I only knew how to lie down and listen to podcasts or watch Christmas movies (it was winter), to put a little balm on my heart. On days like that, generally, I would get up, try to take my prenatal vitamins, which I would vomit straight away. I would go back to bed, wait an hour, try again, and vomit again... I would try to make myself good breakfasts to make me want to eat: my favorite cereals, pastries, but no... Everything came back up in 10-15 minutes.
On those days, I would slump in the chair, wrapped in a blanket, and wonder if I wouldn't prefer to die. I understood the women who resorted to abortion. I wondered how I would get through this and how long I would endure this discomfort.
Some evenings, during dinner, I would feel huge waves of heat all of a sudden and I had to run to the bathroom. Everything would come out at once. My partner was incredulous and told me several times that he wouldn't dare go to a restaurant with me for fear that I would vomit into my plate....
Two very close friends were pregnant at the same time as me. None of them were experiencing the same things as me. They were just a little tired and a little nauseous in the morning... I realized that something was wrong.
One of them took weekly photos of her belly to show the progression of her pregnancy, and she encouraged me to do the same. I felt incapable of it. The mere idea of pretending to smile, of showing my pale or green face discouraged me.
This state weakened me enormously. I had repeated drops in blood pressure and had to take two naps a day to keep going.
I couldn't do anything. I couldn't drive. Going grocery shopping seemed like an insurmountable expedition after which I had to lie down to recover. I couldn't rejoice in being pregnant, and I was worried that the repeated vomiting
would affect the baby. I wasn't happy, I was rather depressed, on the verge of tears constantly.
My gynecologist remained very closed off to my experience. For her, it was normal, it was part of pregnancy, it would pass. I had to split my meals and drink ginger tea. She didn't understand that I was just a shadow of myself, that I didn't enjoy anything anymore, that I was afraid to eat...
Worse, when I explained to her that the only thing that still passed was sweets, she lectured me. She told me that I was at risk of gestational diabetes, that I would be better off seeing a dietitian, but that what I was doing wasn't good for the baby...
Furthermore, since my pregnancy occurred during the Covid 19 pandemic, I was teleworking all the time. So, according to my gynecologist, I was lucky and could continue working. There was no reason to stop. What was I complaining about ?!
In addition to not
taking me seriously, she made me feel guilty about the few things I managed to eat and about my luck of teleworking. I left those appointments in tears, even more devastated than before.
My partner and I had decided to wait until the end of three months to announce my pregnancy to my entourage. In the end, I was so unwell and I needed so much support that after two and a half months, we announced the news to our parents, who were overjoyed.
If there's one piece of advice I would like to give to future moms who experience this condition, it's not to stay isolated, to talk about it, to surround themselves... It's one of the keys to survival. Keeping the pregnancy a secret when you're at your worst is a very bad idea.
My entourage supported me and tried to help me in every possible way. It was my parents who pushed me to see my general practitioner, who knows me very well because she has been following me since my adolescence. She understood right away that I didn't just have simple pregnancy ailments. It was she who put a name to my troubles. She suggested to me twice to be hospitalized. At that time, I had lost 4 kg (starting from 57kg for 1m65).
I was afraid of being hospitalized, and I refused. Here too, if future moms recognize themselves, don't be afraid and go for it. I think it would have done me a lot of good... I thought that the comfort of my home and the proximity of my entourage were more salutary.
Finally, after the first trimester had passed and the nausea and vomiting still persisted, my gynecologist finally prescribed me "Naval**." This medication changed my life. Vomiting went from 4 to 5 times a day to 1 or 2 times a day. Moreover, this medication helped with sleeping, which relieved my insomnia. She advised me several times to stop the medication, but every time I stopped, I started vomiting again. So I took them until the end of my pregnancy. She recommended me to split meals and eat very often. It's one of the pieces of advice that worked.
Overall, I would say there was an improvement after 6 months of pregnancy. I would also say that feeling the baby move inside me and knowing that he was doing well despite everything helped me overcome the illness.
When I think back to my pregnancy, I only liked the seventh month, the only moment when I was finally a little relieved physically and when I could rejoice in being pregnant and enjoy it. The nausea and vomiting calmed down and gave way to back pain, insomnia, false contractions... And I think that if I had stopped taking the Nava**, I would have had vomiting again.
Finally, on June 17, 2021, I gave birth to Florian. Labor was very long. Florian was head down but sideways, which prevented him from descending.
Arriving at the hospital, I immediately asked for an epidural because I had already endured 10 hours of contractions at home, and I felt exhausted. Every time the midwives added a dose of anesthetic, I vomited. As labor was long, I saw several teams of midwives who passed on my case. "Madam vomits a lot."
Finally, after 34 hours of contractions, he arrived. I was able to pick him up and place him on me. This moment will forever be etched in my memory and was worth all the sacrifices. I felt so much love for him, I felt like I had a fireworks display in my heart. And since then, he brightens up my days.
So, if I can give advice to HG mothers, it would be the following:
- Do not stay alone and do not wait for the three-month deadline to talk to your entourage, especially if you feel unbearable vomiting and nausea.
- Don't be afraid to be hospitalized.
- If your gynecologist doesn't listen to you, seek help elsewhere.
- Feeling the baby move in your belly helps overcome the troubles.
- The arrival of the baby erases everything and is worth all the sacrifices.
Lastly, I dream of having a second child, but I'm really afraid of reliving this ordeal.
Especially since in the future, I will have to take care of my first child as well and endure all these troubles at the same time... How to manage both? How not to neglect the first child when the ailments are unbearable and disabling? How to make a small child understand that Mommy cannot take care of him for a while? How to prevent him from resenting the baby in the belly who deprives him of his mom? Thoughts swirl in my head, and for the moment, I have no solution and I feel incapable. That's one of the reasons why I wanted to share my experience. I would like families, partners, the medical community to be aware of the problem and realize the handicap and the hell that this represents for HG moms. I would like to know who to turn to if I had to get pregnant again and relive this ordeal. Having a gynecologist who listens. Being helped psychologically, having work accommodations, help at home, not feeling guilty about one's condition...
I would also like, more broadly, for pregnancy to be better protected in the workplace.
We expect a pregnant woman to produce the same amount of work as before her pregnancy.
She's made to feel guilty and pressured... While she's producing the most beautiful and incredible work in the world: creating a living being out of nothing!
We are not alone, and we must make ourselves heard!
Maurine D,
I wanted, more than anything, to carry life! It was my dream.
I'm a mother of two little girls.
During the first pregnancy, I had to beg my gynecologist to help me, to give me treatment. He asked me to wait until the first trimester, thinking it would get better...
After a ten-kilo loss and given my weakened state, he wanted to hospitalize me, thinking it might be another condition.
I refused and stayed at home. So, he gave me a medication that was miraculous for me! I could finally enjoy my pregnancy! For the second one, I anticipated and started the treatment right away, and everything went well. Dear HG-Mama, do not trivialize the disease. Being pregnant does not mean suffering, seek help.
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Anonymous - Charlotte B.
I discovered my pregnancy before my missed period. Everything disgusted me.
It was an unexpected baby, joy mixed with the anxiety of this sudden announcement. My life quickly became a nightmare.
I had nausea all day long. I was unable to eat anything without vomiting instantly.
I couldn't go out or even get up because I was so weak.
I had to be hospitalized because no treatment was working. I felt very lonely there; no one understood my distress.
After this hospitalization, my condition improved significantly.
When I explain my journey, people talk to me about morning sickness, but it's absolutely nothing like that!
Dear HG-MAMA,
With 5 years of hindsight, I don't regret carrying this pregnancy to term. You are not alone, you are strong, speak up!
IN CONSTRUCTION ...